You, are a manifestation of my gift, and I thank you for being a reflection, a source of strength, support and understanding. Everyone that reads this blog and is a fan of my book and my work, you mean the world to me! I love the fact that you love what I do!
I've always dreamed on having my own column in a paper, where I can run my mouth about whatever I felt like. Now that I have that with this blog, my books, I want to thank you, one of the 4,000+ people that have visited my space and commented positively on what I had to say.
I've always wanted to be and will be the example that people can look at. I am normal. I have issues just like everyone else. I am real with mine and I am not afraid to lay the shit out on the table and tell it like it is...But with determination, focus, drive, will, ambition, and strength you can accomplish anything you can put your mind to.
Three years ago when I started to pen At This Moment, my mother was very ill, almost died, and gave birth to my sister and I had just come out of a deep depression.
For almost all my life I was insecure. I was 20 and I was still hearing people saying negative things to me in my head over and over again. How I was ugly, stupid, fat, how I wouldn't be anything...While I was at Southern, I got over the things that happened in the past.
One night I asked God to give me the strength to get over whatever it was that was making me feel negative about myself. I told him that I wanted to be a writer and share my story with the world. I asked him to put the right people in my life and give me the skills and the insight to become a better person and to put me at a level where I could be used.
A week later there was an advertisement in the school paper. It was looking for writers for the school paper. I applied. The new editor Brandi Jade Thomas interviewed me. She was nice, very personable, very humble and cool. I got the position...I was so happy because Brandi was the first person that God alined me with to help me become the person that I asked (he wanted) to be. She and I are good friends to this day.
Anyway, when I got back to L.A. was dating this guy who is now a popular singer that I went to High School with. Bad relationship, it was like a reversal of everything I got over...So I wrote. I then asked God to lead me the right way...I wanted to publish this book. I went to the book store to buy my dosage of Sister 2 Sister Magazine, Ebony, and Vibe...and on the table there was this book, "How to Publish, Promote and Sell Your Own Book." I picked it up, spent my last 14.00 and actually overdrew my account to get this book. Long story short 33,000 dollars spent, 3,000+ books sold, and 2,559.00 in debt, I have my book.
The moral to the tale, no matter what you are going through mentally, physically, emotionally, there is a way out. You have to want the way out. You can do anything you put your mind to! People will hate, discourage, cock block, and do everything in their power to try to stop you from your shine! (Including Yo Momma an nem cause mine did too...) Press Forth! My motto is "If it's to be, it's up to me!" Use it! Don't be afraid to fail! You'll never what the outcome will be...Leave the past in the past! It's old! And only the past is used to stop the good you're doing in the present...And have faith in yourself!
Tomorrow...Suicide 101. And Marques Houston Posing For Playgirl!