The meaningless sex with the countless jump offs.
The overindulgence in food,
not getting enough exercise
letting everything and everyone get to you.
blaming that on the break up, when you know you should have cut it off long before.
doing more than would you should.
being nice, when you really should have said fuck you.
listening to them, her and that when you should have followed your heart.
breaking all of the rules only to win - but really to loose.
comparing yourself to them, when you should have been focused on YOU.
not caring enough about yourself to stop
when God gave you countless chances to get it right before it was too late.
loving him harder than you should.
accepting things you shouldn't have.
maxing out that credit card after you just paid it off.
giving a show, when it should have been your off night.
whispering I love you in his ear when you were on his back...knowing it was a lie.
cutting people off unwarranted (but wait...they knew what they were doing)
not telling your best-friend you love her.
trying to make it work out when you threw in the towel.
...none of this shit matters.
because you didn't love yourself enough to stop.
care about yourself enough to breathe.
respect yourself enough to get up and walk away.
trust your own mind over matter.
and believe in yourself enough to STAND UP.
but it's a cool place to be - when you can turn all of that around and say.
I made it.
It won't happen again.
I know what to do now...
and you regain yourself.
not letting any of that dictate who you are today...
but a mere growing pain,
to know it when you see it.
to change it as it's happening.
so you won't fall into the same trap again.
it all comes back to you...