I'm a good friend. I have a big heart and most of the time I go out of my way to help and extend my hand because often times I am reminded of the times when I was down and there was no one there to help me, I don't ever want anyone to go through half of the shit I went through...alone at least. I always had to pull myself up and was always pissed that everyone just watched my demise, as if they were waiting on me to fall and not get up. I am not one to ask for much of anything...I try to be self-sufficient, but hell I'm gonna let it be known when I need help, everyone needs it. And whenever I need help people they never come through when I ask them and it annoys the fuck out of me. Then I end up getting stressed, overworked, underpaid, broke, on a food and reefer binge from the left wing of hell pissed at the world because people are donkeys.
But I don't let that ever change my good nature. I just cut people off and say fuckem...but I always take the pleasure in taking a dump on someone when they come and ask me for something after they acted like pure asses when I needed something. And people always like saying you can't be like that - give them a chance, be nice, blah, blah, blah...FUCK THAT! Sometimes we have to show these hoes better than we can ever tell them, cause some people just don't get it until they are the example.
Last night, my dear friend - who shall remain nameless did something for me that caused me to have a emotional breakdown on my way through the canyon last night...well part of it was because I a get so afraid of driving near Mulholland Drive down through Beverly Hills and driving around white people in the dark to get home and the other was the fact that someone finally came through. After a series of let downs and a bunch of vicious sharks in the water - and everyone wanting a piece of the pie - something came up unexpected, I almost threw my hands up...but I didn't tell anyone, I said nothing. Then I called my friend just telling him what was going on...not wanting anything. And he came through...and now that I think about it, thats his pattern. Small shit that he thinks doesn't matter or make a difference, like buying dinner, or hangin' out - just having a conversation, listening to me. That stuff is priceless - and I finally have gotten a reward for all the good that I've done. And it's good to know when you really need something, someone is there. I can't wait till I get my first million...
Over the course of the week, I've learned that we have to love our friends for who they are. The good, the bad, the ugly. I know that being my friend is a hella difficult task, but for the most part it's not all that bad...but that doesn't mean we have to put up with stupid ass bullshit...there is a fine line. Find the balance - but love your friends. Because eventually karma will be on your side.
For the people that keep me going daily...thank you.
For the people that I can't see that send me positive energy...thank you. I receive it.
For all of the people that send bad vibes...fuck yall stupid bitches, what goes around comes around.
For all the people that support...thank you, I appreciate it.
For all the people that love and love hard. Keep loving and loving hard.
For all the people that have been hurt, there is light at the end of the tunnel.
For all the people that have lost inspiration. The sun will always shine and the moon will always glow.
For all the people that don't know where to turn. Look in the mirror, the answer has always been there.
For all the people that snatch everyone elses joy, you'll mind someone...someday.
For all of those that have given up on life. You're still living...
For all of those who have put their goals aside for everyone else. It's your turn. And it's not too late.
For all of those who are in the struggle. I am here with you. I'm no different. We can grow and learn from each others experiences and turn our struggle into progress.
I recorded half of it and was interrupted by a splitting headache - that eventually went away but by that time, I had to get my mom situated from her weekend fiasco - all mixed in with a small intimate gathering.
Nonetheless, I am paying for my extreme fatigue, my whack ass diet, and my weekend partying. It all caught up with me today...
So - I'll more than likely scrap what I recorded and start over...
Standby - sorry for the mishap...
I hope you guys had a great weekend. Mine was just ok. I've been so busy that I haven't have the time to hangout with friends and temporarily place everything else going on in my life on the back burner.
The weekend for me was lovely. It was quiet and spent with people I enjoy spending time with...
This week until November I am going to be hella busy. I officially start my PR and Promo campaign for the new book tomorrow, then the book release is July 9th*, Book release party, Tour...and soon as that wraps, I'll be announcing and launching a writer that is on my publishing roster. So this week was well spent and right on time...but I'm pretty sure I'll have fun out on the road too...
Here are some of the pics from the weekend:
my B.F.F and me...
Me & Lalah
Me, Tha R & Petey
OMG. I you guys don't understand how elated I am right now! I complain a whole lot when I go through shit. But to see the finished product is sooo fuckin' amazing and it surpasses any potential road block that I've faced in me getting to this point! I've worked extremely hard to get this shit done, not only for my supporters - but for me! Writing this book has been a cleansing long overdue and I know that sooooo many of you will be able to relate to this installment of "Maverick's" life. I am excited.
To all of my readers that have continually supported, read, listened - I sooo thank you. I mean that. At the end of the day you guys make it all the better.
All the release dates...
It's finally complete (We'll it's been done since December...but) - now It's time for me to hit the road! LOL...I am about to dance in the middle of my office. Do a Tomkat and jump on my bosses couch!
It seems as if the server in which is dedicated to syndicating my show...lol, responsible for airing my show is having a problem...AGAIN. These cunt ass bitches, or whoever is behind the scenes over there needs to get their shit together!!! It must be some splaboovian insurgents trying to single handedly ruin me...It must have been something I said. Oh well! I guess when they get their shit together it will work and you'll hear my antics. I can't afford to have my 100 episodes down the drain like that. I need them in one spot...fuckers!!! 100 episodes! That's a lot of fuckin' shit talkin...PEOPLE NEED TO HEAR ME!!! And while I am on shit talking, I just want to publicly state a fact - that is already apparent and obvious as Janet Jackson's nosejob.
THE CAPTAIN IS A DONKEY! The only thing he knows how to captain is that raggedy ass lost ship he's sailing on the sand. I would really hate to see one of his ex-fling-gay lovers-scorned pop up and stab him for spreading his wicked ministry of gays going to hell. That would be a travesty. I propose that all gay children of America carry small vials of ammonia. That way if one of these psychotic presumed heterosexuals pose a false threat then they can empty the contents into one of their eye sockets.
Lets think about it. What if a militia of gay men scorned banned together in common bond and terrorized presumed heterosexuals or what they thought were homophobic men - and started stabbing them...then what...food for thought.
BACK TO YOUR WORK DAY PEOPLE...MILL ALONG IN NORMAL FASHION!
Standout tracks: If I have My Way, In This For You, Is The Way Love Feels, I Am One, Your Joy.
After interviewing him for my Friday Finale, I had to immense myself into the world of Jesse O, the first ever openly gay, R&B singer of the new millennium. While the comments on the interview were mixed - a few complained that the interview did not feature any of his music or there was no reason to support his music, I decided to give you one. I always like to remind people to support the cause, even if you have to support, because of the fact that he's a black, gay, man. But there is more to it than that.
If the current state of R&B is any indication of the sign of things to come then Jesse O is the way to turn. He is another artist that just sings without all of the overproduced hijinks of producers who aren't musicians and the studio tricks that performers use and once they are live, they sing under the notes that were once there in the studio. He draws us in to his world by using his relaxing, smooth voice matched with a mix of eclectic drum thumping, R&B based tracks, that are a relief to today’s radio. Most singers can not take credit for writing their own material – but how many singers come to mind that not only write and produce their own music? But the bigger question is where have those artists gone who have done both? If the past is a great prediction for the future then Jesse O may have a career as rich as Stevie Wonder, Prince, Marvin Gaye or Rahsaan Patterson.
While the more radio friendly track is “Set The Record Straight,” that doesn’t mean that the rest of the CD is without merit. It is on tracks such as “Big Trip,” “My Brotha,” and “I Won’t Argue With It,” that Jesse showcases his vocal abilities and you can literally hear him preparing taking his place in R&B music. More so than anything, I think the Exposure EP which can be purchased on I-Tunes or CD Baby is a sign of things to come. As indicated in my interview his is obvious focus, this is not the last that we'll ever hear of Jesse O and I believe that he'll make an impact on the future of R&B music...I heard that he slayed the kids in New York over the weekend...another cd that gets the TRENT JACKSON STAMP OF APPROVAL.
Speaking of good R&B vocalists...remember the Days of Deborah Cox...she's one of my favorites, who like Chante Moore is a versatile artist in which they can sing anything. Deborah Cox could sing polka and make the shit sound like angels singing. While I don't know how happy I was when I initially heard that Deborah, once a happy member of the Clive Davis' dream team, was doing a jazz album. I wanted so bad for her and Clive to makeup and he give her the real chance she deserved. I think she really didn't get her due because Clive got pushed from arista and he was too busy focusing on Whitney... Nonetheless Deborah comes back just as I remember her. Voice, face and talent still bankable and I actually enjoy her renditions of timeless jazz classics that showcase her talent. It's classic to hear an orchestra compliment a voice so tamed - it's a perfect match that makes sense, that almost makes you wonder if Deborah should have pursed Jazz instead of the shaky road of R&B. It's apparent that Jazz is her comfort zone and even if you don't like Jazz you'll enjoy the voice that you're familiar with. I respect Deborah - because she didn't sell out and take off her clothes to try and keep her career on track. She realized that she was a singer and she stayed true to her talent and craft. I'll have to admit, while I love the CD vocally, the material is not gonna have me off in a corner somewhere wishing I was in Harlem Nights getting drunk with Della Reese, going on some heist in an alley...or selling Smack to Miss. Diana in Lady Sings the Blues. This is not one I'll play a whole lot. This is out of respect and support of a true vocalist. But still, it gets the TRENT JACKSON STAMP OF APPROVAL.
Standout Tracks: I Don't Hurt Anymore, Smoke Gets In Your Eyes, September In The Rain, This Bitter Earth, Destination Moon
and what it had to bring.
i was excited about growing up
going to college...
i was a boy then - sheltered from the harsh realities of life.
as it unfolded before me,
the more and more i lost my zest for life.
nothing moves me today
no greater than it did yesterday.
i don't look forward to much of anything
since it will probably be a disappointment anyway.
And I think I wanted it that way. I really wanted to go in...record. But that wasn't my agenda.
I wanted to go in and say thanks to the 300 people that have emailed me over the last week, some of whom would have gotten a taste of my radio show for the first time. Sorry...
I am still getting it together.
I can't speak freely like I want to.
I can't tell my friends or people I call as such that I really hate them and I think they are whack.
I can't tell my printer to go fuck herself while they still have my shit.
I can't tell my coworker that she's an idiot and she's better off being a beach bum...
You can't say that because people are fragile.
They are hurt.
and I can't expect them to think, process, act or be anything remotely close to who I am.
I think too much.
I have low tolerance.
I expect the best of myself.
I expect the best from others.
I want my friends to respect me, not CROSS the line and try to flip it as it's MY FAULT.
I want to love and love hard.
I want to be honest without evoking so much drama and denial.
All of this is true.
I still got a lot of work to do.
While I am in transition
making sense of things
what am I to do?
Just be who you are...
dare to be different.
be the one to speak up.
speak the truth.
call yourself on your faults and work to change them.
don't point the finger
be honest while being tactful, even if it hurts. Growing pains....?
I know it's time to step up.
I can't take everyone with me.
Not everyone wants to go.
Everything has it's time...and it's place.
Mine is now.
I believe many
people have delusions of grandeur. They got the nice bodies...but the spirits
underneath are dead. They look good...but they don't know how to BE good.
They are physically SEXY but have no sex appeal. It's a hollow
So I get there and call them, give them the description of my car and they bring out my order. They always bring my food in a nice bag, napkins, bread, etc. This time the asshole bring out the pizza box and that's it. I was so mad. Instead of me going off on his ass and cursing him out and demanding to speak to a manager for his lack of enthusiastically-wonderful customer service, I just took the food and drove off. I didn't feel like getting all loud, even though my day up to that point had been shitty. But that's old...What I like about going through shit, there is always tomorrow to come to...
I spent Saturday figuring out whether or not I was going to my friends surprise party. I haven't been really feeling social - and I didn't want to go to her party because I am a spiteful bitch and she has not only missed my book release launch and my last three parties, but she only calls when she's going through some great horrific tragedy - So I went, but don't think I didn't call her out and remind her that she's never supported me. Anyway, this is my first time seeing her in 7 months...I forgave but not before calling her out.
I guess in the end we have to forgive our friends, because their have been plenty who constantly forgive us. But I hate it when a muthafucka know's their out of line and they want to try and spin it like it's your fault. Hmmpph. Whatever. Life goes on. And at the end who gives a flying fuck....Pass me a blunt.