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Read my blog, listen to my shows, read my books...then you'll know me. Thanks.

12.07.2010

I'm So Famous...

  • Nothing like waking up to a plump booty staring you in the face and "Monster" by Kanye West playing in the background.
  • I've always wanted to walk up to a dude and say, "Gimme some of that butt." Imma have to try that shit, to a salacious looking bottom I spot on the train...#NastyHoe
  • I'm looking forward to the snow flurries...they have already started...lite
  • Sunday (my spazz day) was, what would have been my Grandmother's 84th b.day. I woke up and made Jell-o. The green kind. The kind she used to make me when I was a kid. She was a nice woman until she was crossed. I'll never understand why she stayed with my Grandfather. That man was vicious. The things he did to her and her children...no wonder my mom and her siblings are far left...
  • I do this to myself every time I write a book. The last two times were no different.
  • Someone will get it one day and I'll be able to experience.
  • I really hate when I get lied to from people who like my work. If you're going to lie and tell me you're reading my book, please get the title straight.
  • Someone told me that they appreciated seeing me in love...my last ex. Yeah, I did love that guy...for all of the wrong reasons. My insecurities aren't his fault. But it was beautiful comment nonetheless. It reminded me that I'm capable of being in love. I forgot how to do that.
  • The 35+ FedEx man who smells like fresh, masculine, testosterone is becoming more appealing by the second with his fine, full-bearded grown ass.
  • I'd prefer someone to teach me a few things. I've been giving lessons for years...
  • I was thinking about all that I've been through. Specifically when I literally lost my mind, the summer of 2008. I can't wait for you to read about it...I was not taking prescription meds to alter my moods. Bitch give me a blunt and a Rahsaan Patterson CD.
  • There is no such thing as ADD/ADHD All you gotta do is spend time with your children and show them some affection & attention #ProblemSolved
  • WOAWOAWOAWOAWOA the ring didn't mean a thing!
  • Doesn't Susan Boyle look like she's borderline Down's Syndrome?
  • I need to meet Aunt Bunny. OOOOOOOH YEAH!
  • #Taurus and I are actually getting closer by the day. He's starting to eat the food I make. Before he didn't take shit when I offered it. Now he's helping himself...
  • You know, I knew he was cool when I first met him. But I was thrown off by his extreme moodiness. I've never met anyone more moody than me. That's saying a whole lot. :-/
  • At the subliminal suggestion of Laz Alonso I made Fruit Loop Treats...you know the alternative to Rice Crispy treats. I can't wait to give them to some 8 year old to see them get a sugar rush...I've been jacked up all night. He was talking about them, I had to make them.
  • I really need to get my diet back in order...
  • I don't understand why the fuck T-Mobile made me go to some website other than theirs, to download some fuckin' silly ass update for my phone. Isn't this high tech piece of shit supposed to have automation for shit like this? No one has time for this crap!
  • I can't wait to see Livingston tonight
  • Sometimes, it's best that your "old friends" stay exactly where they are, on pause.
  • For the life of me I'll never understand why I sit and wait until the last minute to do everything. I had a final due at 5:40 P.M. yesterday. I started on it at 3:45 at work, I get off at 4:30. 
  • I work in a field with primarily men. There are only 4 women in my office out of 50 people. I have interviews this morning and I really hope none of them are homosexual. I don't have time to be flirted with and to be sprinkled with glitter. Besides, you ain't givin' up no ass anyway.
  • I told them if they didn't give me my money, I was going to bring my 200+ pound ass down there and skrip naked until they ran me my money!
  • "I'm so famous, I took any half you had and made it whole."
  • #Taurus actually helped me do my laundry...
  • When people try and plot your downfall, they eventually give up once they see that you're untouchable.
  • It took me a long time to get that memo that everyone isn't against me. But I can know spot when they are.

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